Morning darling


How are the exercises to beat the other exercises that transcended the other exercises going in caravan land?


My am I missing your sweaty tent


Not long now darling


You know how those that are truly special are exempt from all rules and regulations 


Howard Springs def has a 4 star quality to it


Let’s get to Guinea 


‘We are no longer going to entrust politics to one man, we are going to entrust politics to the people.’


Said some bloke who has taken over.


‘Guinea is beautiful. We don’t need to rape Guinea anymore, we just need to make love to her.’


Why, such advanced sentiments. 


Imagine the geo-political repercussions of that.


Any wonder I am sitting in a negligee thinking of you?


Shall we discuss the economic bauxite fall-out or a few things a bit bigger?


Move on over.


Sit tight.


We couldn’t imagine.


Girls, rustle up a map.


Get your Scout’s badge on.


If they let you, that is.



Hey, it’s Manet not Marilyn but what’s a few vowels after the big brassy main letter? 


Sort of like Y and R in the same name. 


You feel me?



Now darling heart, isn’t it strange that the persona non grata or tis depending on your morning energy drink that is nothing compared to what the professionals drink – little swarthy minions of muscle led recovery – QATAR is taking alot of these Afghani’s.


Who knew.


Well, me.


See the difference?


Eyes. Money. Country.


Poor people. Papers. Nothing.


What a fucking revolution.


Said Susan.





Bags getting stuck with the Aussie lot in the Middle East.


‘We can’t return to BrizVegas’


Well, what can we do with you all in the desert heat?


What could you be doing over there?


MAK and I can rustle up a few hoofs and see how you go around the track.


Breed a Melbourne Cup winner.


Saddle sore?


Not likely.


All that FAT-I-GUE fashion.


Now what could they be doing.


Lies back.


Thinks of former English protectorates.


And other things.


Big place Dubai.


Big buildings. 


COVID is the damndest strangest thing.



Dutt Dutt Minister for Defo or the man who brings Ron Mueck sculptures to life –  had much to say recently before he heads off to eat Australian lamb with Joe Joe Silverfox Biden.


The Yanks can elect sexy old men.


We just hide ours.


Scottish nose hair. The Epsom salts of the 21st Century.


Bags not being William Wallace. Fuck no.


Where was I.


We need to develop ‘long range strike weapons, offensive cyber and unmanned capabilities, including swarming drones.’


‘We are going to embrace asymmetric warfare as the offensive party rather than the defensive party’


Oh Dutt Dutt.


‘He calls on the Americans to give greater effect to Australia’s inclusion in its defence industry base.’


American missile technology in Australia?


Wonders never cease.


One billion announced in March so we can hop on together and razzle dazzle our Climate Commitments.


Sort of like a horse. Bit pointy. Bit expensive. Bit fucking secret.


If you’re feeling a bit low, just pull out page 2 of Wednesday’s OZ by Greg ‘I have Never Met An American Policy I Didn’t Like’ Sheridan


Seriously, no anti-depressants needed kids. Your teenage angst will be seriously cured when you read this out loud. Take turns. Use different accents. Insert a different country’s name every time they mention Australia. 


Kids, when done, scribble over the top and make coloured lanterns from the big words.


I’ll be just desperate to see swarm technology in action. 


‘Mum, who let the pool pony’s out’


I love you. I do. This is brilliant.


Wonder what is for dessert.


It’s going to crumble delicately and just melt in my mouth.




Nothing to discuss in Washington.


‘When I said withdraw, I didn’t mean it.’




It is all about consent.