Look I’m Thin

Look I’m Thin 

So Fit 

So Fit 

 

I’ve run 30 kilometres

I’ve eaten yak balls for lunch

Watch me eat my Protein Ball

 

I’m Thin

I’m Thin

I’m Fit

I’m So Fit

 

You can’t find my pulse

I’m Controlled

So in Control 

Got my Fleece on

Got my runners On

Got my Fitbit on 

I’m rich damn it

I’m rich

And if I’m not

I’ll look like it

 

Yeah look at my calves 

Yeah look at my calves

 

Look at my bike

Look at my bike

 

It cost so much money

I got it air lifted 

From Germany

Hand made 

With spec Specs 

Yeah real specs

That you can’t understand

It’s technical

Specs

So you can’t understand 

Cause I’m an Alpha Man

I’m the New Man 

For a New Age 

You got nothin’ on me

 

Look at me run 

Oooohhhh

Look at me run

I’ve skied through Nepal

I’ve traversed Mount Bulla 

I’ve climbed the Rock 

With Dior reah

Yeah 

 

I ate spiders in Bolivia

I’ve got a mate in the Military

We did a rally in Afghanistan

With no water

Just the water 

From the car

And we drank it

Speaking fluent 

Afghani- ese

While quickly checking

On the political landscape 

Oops 

That was totally top secret 

 

I went to Oxford

And I am hyphenated 

Totally understated 

Totally 

The One 

 

I’ve ridden horses with Mullahs

Endurance Xtra Endurance

With special horses and stuff

Specially flown in from

Arabia 

Geez!

 

And the horses didn’t even have

Saddles 

It was straw

Our shoes were made specially 

In Finland

From Sherpa 

Stuff 

From Sherpa Land 

 

Yeah I’m an Alpha Male

From the Alpha New Age

 

Look at my watch

Look at my watch

I eat bird seed

But it can really stuff with your training 

So you have to be 

Careful 

You don’t want 

It lactic acid 

Cause that would be

Bad

 

So eat the seed 

That doesn’t come from birds 

You have to cut down

On Calories

 

It takes Discipline

And perseverance 

You’ll get there 

 

Just off for a bike

Yeah I really need to get on my 

Bike 

Where’s my bike?

Oh I feel lost without my bike

 

Look at my Pecs

Look at my Pecs 

 

Look at my running clothes

Black and grey

I like to run the gauntlet 

From black to grey 

 

Yeah totally understated

Totally procreated 

 

I’m an Alpha Male

I’m a Alpha Male 

 

But you wouldn’t know it

Because I don’t like to talk much

And when I do

It’s just really great stuff

Like fitness advice

And stuff I can discuss 

With my wife

 

Because we’re together

Totally together

We have 

Our Finances

Together 

 

But that paperwork

Whew 

We do serious stuff

And you don’t 

 

I’m an Alpha Male

 

Look at me

Look at me

 

Look I’m So Fit. 

 

I’m my High School Weight. 

 

So, what’s news with you?