KH in room with assistants

Has everyone got their hem up right? I mean pulls out tape measure oh I am not sure that will do. I am sure he will want it up another ten millimetres. Gosh Scout, yes, not at all what we need. Another ten mm for you. 

rushs around 

Hil, are you showing too much flesh? I hope you are not trying to be funny, Hil. Here at democracy central we are Serious and Together Involved in Important Pursuits and down time will not be accepted unless of course it involves a new battleship or two. But you know, cavorting on the world stage is Just Not Done.

golden head around corner

Oh Dex! Fancy you being here. I was just wording up the gels on your fascinating views on how we should behave. We’ve just been beside ourselves waiting for your grand entrance and now that you are here quick girls, have you got the tribute? Bows low at his feet sweet Buddhist utterings blah blah blah of a Buddhist kind, but as you know, religion is bad unless you are in Tibet. Or Western China, isn’t that right Dex? Although we do only like people that are scientific. So that is strange. And Biden is a Catholic. I’m confused, are you confused girls? Very confusing Dex. Science is very interesting. Just like you.

Well I’m not sure

Oh sit down Dex! Are you weary from all those real estate investment pursuits? Bruise a finger with the share allocations? Quick Hill, bring some ice. Dex is going to regale us with his Favourite Female Australian Prime Minister before letting us in on a few movements around the joint. Bring me a bowl so I can wipe his lovely little forehead and catch the drippings before I give it to the dogs. They’ll think it is a heavenly anointment from their leader who has organised the Whole World with such precision. Quick Hil no time to waste!!!! I mean, big things are going on Dex, aren’t there, and who better to lead it than you?

smiles at him, while saturating him with water

Oh Dex! I hope you don’t feel uncomfortable. Remember, it is just a little water! That’s what they keep telling me. So loving, don’t you think? A real participatory democracy, that’s us! Everyone gets to bag one person out! Full of real compassion and leadership. Gosh Dex, did you think of it? Because you think of everything and you are so clever.

I’m not sure what I could have done to deserve such 

Oh darling, don’t speak. I don’t want you to get the idea that we want you to contribute to society via a meaningful exchange. I want you to exist as a symbol! As a leading light! Forget human touch though. And well, love, yes that too. That’s for us Dex. You have to be alone! You have been chosen! To be alone. Not sure what for but anyway, that’s how humans operate. Oh and if you know, you want a little quickie, we’ll do you while you sleep. It’s the way forward! Isn’t that what the Scots say Hil? And they also know everything. Apparently. You just lie back there and let me handle everything. We love you! We just can’t touch you, a bit like the lepers of India. Maybe you’ve introduced a caste system here. One never can tell.

Do I get to

No darling, no. I know everything you think and do which is marvellous, because I then get to put you in invidious positions that humiliate you and when you get upset, accuse you of weakness. You’ll love this, do you think Amnesty has this is in one of their brochures for 3rd World Travel? Because I think we do something glossy, and then discuss the South China Sea imbroglio. Do they have that in the military commando shots coming out of QLD because I guess you could actually open a can of worms on this and then wait oh no Dex, bad timing. Really bad timing. Probably not a good idea. We wouldn’t want that. wipes sweat from brow. Darling you have been preserved so well. How did you do it? I was thinking, what about a little granite carving in Lane Cove? Sort of like a Grotto. What about Balmoral? Too waspy for you. You are all edge and dangerous precision. Let’s see. sighs. Lithgow? I’ve got it. How about we do a twin rock formation jutting out from Jervis Bay! Oh Dex. That might upset my Captain and I know you don’t like idle gossip. Or girls who cavort on pontoons. Might embarrass you! Satire can be soooooo unseemly, don’t you think? Oh Dex, that would never do. 

I just thought

No! I have the policy here, ready just for you. Lead is my middle name, and lead I will, just for you! If you are going to lead, you have no time for idle pursuits like satire! Good god no! Just good old fashioned behaviour according to what Dex sees as appropriate, and darling here I am to fulfil your every wish and desire. whispers Quick question Dex, you might actually have to tell me something or god forbid, talk to me about you know, the thing, because I’m not that good at charades and years of university didn’t train me for obtuse directions about something so significant. You catch my drift Dex? Gosh you look lovely. A real delight. I mean Hil, look at this man! Together, we’re going to take on the world. Me behind, and he out in front, parting the Red Sea. Or Blue Green Water Navy. Whatever. sighs.

A real team.